Hannibal S01E01 (NBC, 2013-)

Only one name made me sit down and watch this show:  Bryan Fuller.  The man whose shows Pushing Daisies and Dead Like Me were tragically cut short.  Those shows weren't my cuppa tea, I tell you, but they were watchable - more than watchable:  entertaining television.

The pilot is good.  Mr Fuller and friends seem to have taken into account all of the Hannibal material rather than committee cherry-picked from the films.  This is promising.

Think I'll have to watch it again with the Better Half at my side.

The Walking Dead S03E13

The more I watch this show, the more I hate myself for watching this show.

Cracked S01E01-02 (CBC, 2013-)

The concept is as old as The Odd Couple:  a crazy/kooky/damaged cop who solves crimes.

Cracked certainly has its share of crazy, kooky and damage, and after the pilot I thought I had it pegged.  Case of the week, team work that doesn't get in the way of the hero cop being in the right place at the right time, and shit details for not only fans of procedurals like myself but likely those who work in mental health.  I was mostly right.

It was the second ep that distilled my pros and cons about the show:

• when the Consulting Psychiatrist goes into a situation on her own, and she clocks clues that she's very likely with the Murderer, Don't fucking poke the bear, lady;
• when the Hero Cop saves the Consulting Psychiatrist from aforementioned situation, Cuff the perp to ensure he's no longer a threat rather than presume he's knocked out from your flurry of manly blows and go straight to your potential series love interest;
• I know it's only the second ep but I was over the moon pretty glad that the show did not reinforce the stereotype that all mad people kill - some do, sure, but mostly they're a danger to themselves.

I completely understand some licence has to be taken for the sake of drama so, sure, interrogate a mentally unwell suspect because there's a ticking clock - but, Jesus H Christ almight:  you sure you want to assume the general population hasn't seen Cops in this lifetime?

Justified S04E08

Whatever I last said about this season, I clearly wasn't passionate enough.

A cop show where the hero's father is a consistently mean sumbitch, where the recently-engaged couple of the show's world are its ambitious and charming crime-lord and -lady, and a well-meaning ex-army buddy with a habit lays the tracks for his own trainwreck and might just be a career-turner for Ron Eldard.  God. Damn.

If you aren't already watching this show, I need you to go stand in the corner there while I count to ten and calm the heck down.

The Walking Dead S03E10

Been a Michael Rooker fan since Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer, and through all the cardboardy, cartoony redneck sicko characters he's portrayed in the last couple of decades, there's always been something worth watching about him, something goddamned human.

Not so in this season where his Merle Dixon is a masterpiece of tissue-thin characterisation with a flaming neon sign above his head screaming I'm a plot instigator, and I'm like, Are you fuckin' shitting me?

Update:  Yeah, by ep's end, there's hope.  But I can't help but think of that wonderful phrase, With hope in one hand and shit in the other, which do you think'll fill up first?

Secret State (Channel 4, 2012)

Disclosure:  I've had a crush on Gabriel Byrne for as long as I can remember.  Part of it is the Irish brogue.  Another part is that, no matter how shitty the material, he's been believable and watchable every time.

In Secret State, Byrne plays a national leader reluctant to do battle, but when required to do so, does so with heart and conviction.  Charles Dance is in it, too, in a nice role.  I don't want to say any more - I enjoyed this mini-series immensely, so much I might even watch it again.  So what if it was a little hard to believe Byrne's character being involved in the shenanigans of the series' plot, or that the dialogue was sometimes a bit on-the-nose, or that the cast of characters was so big as to make me spend crucial seconds at the head of some scenes trying to figure out who the hell was talking.

If you're a fan of Dave, you enjoyed the class of Bletchley Circle, and you fancy yourself a closet political pundit, Secret State is highly recommended.

Transporter: The Series S01E01-02

Sure the pilot had to have everything the films have but on a smaller per-minute budget, and it didn't disappoint.  ("Not disappointing" is possible when expectations are "this is going to be awful".)

It's not the kind of show for me.

Which raises the question of why I'm bothering to watch the second ep as I type this.  It's not the car chases - and in the ep, there's an ATV chase so far.  It's not the wooden acting.  Not the script which seems to have been written by the people who gave us The Sweeney (breasts, industrial-stylised simulated sex, and the f-word in every second sentence).

I know:  it's the guns.  There're so many of them.  And they're used so often.

... Aaaannd no.  The expository-bogged second and third acts have given me a headache.

Goodbye Frank.

The Following (Fox, 2013-)

There's been buzz about this show - I think I even bought into it last year - that the pilot deserves.  It's got good acting from Kevin Bacon and Natalie Zea (and a lot of hamming from James Purefoy and some serious character underdevelopment for Jeananne Goossen), a decent script from Kevin Williamson, and execution that is stylish, pacey with occasional flourishes to remind what B material this is.

Half way through the ep, I realised how self-referencing it is, and by the time the engine of the series is revealed, I think, Fuck this - shoot the fucker and stop this shit right the fuck now.

No one listens to me, of course.  There's fourteen more episodes of this rubbish.

But at least I've seen what the buzz is about.

Justified S04E03-04

It took a couple of eps - slow story-, character- and scene-setting stuff - and then ep 03 comes along and taps you with a police baton, and then ep 04 jolts you to the heart with the Story of Ellen May.

The care the writers take with the characters, taking them on arcs that are unlikely and unpredictable but totally believable, shines through with their female characters - and encapsulated by this season's time with Abby Miller's whore-with-a-heart-of-gold (but otherwise entertainingly dim) Ellen May.  She means well.  She's not trying to make trouble.  She's just a little girl lost.

All of the above sound like I'm making excuses for a character I have the hots for.  (Besides not being my type) Ellen May is all of the above, and Miller's portrayal captures perfectly an innocence that's not quite been lost or buried, and the Story of Ellen May is that much more gripping for it.

After a third season that just couldn't compare with its preceding cuticle-gnawing sophomore season, season four might be where the makers of Justified elevate the show to all-time greatness.

Falcon: The Silent and the Damned (Sky, 2012)

Where The Blind Man of Seville was an intriguing detective mystery, The Silent and the Damned was... a talky and bland procedural for morons.

Great acting, though.  Nice scenery, too - even had me flashing on Almodavar.

But God what a boring story.

The Hour - Season 2 - Debrief

Half-way through the season finale, more-than-a-mere-housewife Marnie Madden tells her philandering TV-star husband Hector that she's preggers.  Except - was it the penultimate ep? - Hector told colleague and proper journo Freddie Lyon that he was sterile.  Dominic West's craft - ho, Bal'more! - coupled with the absolute lack of dialogue for those precious few seconds, were television gold.

It's a pity it was one of a mere few flakes of the shiny stuff that The Hour has thrown up this season.  Everything else has been exposition, melodrama and pantomime level dialogue.  Pity.

The Hour S02E02

My last post about this show was two months ago.  That's how excited the season opener made me feel about moving on to the next ep.  (What with Last Resort and Vegas, not very.)

So I started watching the second ep last night and I found myself admiring the widescreen telly we have - that Sony box has done us well, it has - oh wait, that guy from The Wire has just gotten himself thrown in gaol and - my, it's been ages since I've vacuumed the ceiling.

There is a sore and desperate need for some bloody drama in this show that is really lacking.  "But the guy from The Wire's in gaol!" you cry.  Don't care.  "Oh no, the Perfume guy's French wife has just been inked!" you shriek.  Don't care.  "And the woman from Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights - oh her heart, 'tis broke!" you rail.

Don't.  Fucking.  Care.

Vegas S01E11

Ay, wow.

Okay, the Little Brother getting something on with the Gangster's Daughter plot I can do without - or it could do with a lot less cheese.  Sure, the Sheriff's Son relationship with the Spicy Sheriff's Office Manager has so far been nicely underplayed.  Yeah, Quaid's Lamb is beginning to grate with the teeth-flashing and guttural noises that are supposed to pass for hero-of-few-words.

But it's Chiklis' Savino that's really beginning to shine.  My doubts of a post-Shield Chiklis as a Chicago mobster have been shoved aside by Chiklis as a Mobster with a Dream.  People are doing things with the best intentions.  Complications are ensuing.  Things are going to get worse before they get better.

What a great way to come into the new year.

Zero Dark Thirty (2012; Kathryn Bigelow / Mark Boal)

Engrossing, intense, didn't-feel-like-150-minutes, classy filmmaking.

Barely a week into 2013 and I've already got a film of the year contender.

Transporter: The Series (RTL, 2012-)

Whaaat?

And the sad thing is I'm gonna watch the pilot because that's how sad I am.

2013

Went to see Bond 23 (I sat here a full minute trying to remember the bloody title and failed) at an actual cinema last weekend. I've never really minded the exaggerated opening of packets of crisps - some motherfuckers think that if they open their packets slowly, no one will notice - but I can understand the motivation behind the slow-opening of packets: people are trying to be considerate. Talkers have been... open to negotiation on shutting the fuck up during a movie. But nowadays - maybe it's my age - it's people who think it's okay to check their txts during the movie that make me wish I could throw a Jaffa down-theatre (my aim is shit and what do I look like to you, a dickhead?).

Still can't remember the name of the Bond title. I know Daniel Craig is in it, with Ralph Fiennes, Javier Bardem, Judy Dench, Ben Wishaw and Naomie Harris. I know that it mostly wiped away the fucking shitty taste of Casino Royale and Quantum of Solace. And that it was directed by Sam Mendes, with opening theme by Adele.

Fucking hell, I'm off reservation.

Back to the point of this post. This is just a list of what I'm looking forward to this year.

Must see: Star Trek Into Darkness 'cause the last one was so damned fun, The Last Stand 'cause of Arnie, A Good Day to Die Hard 'cause hey it's a Die Hard ep, Iron Man 3 'nuff said, Man of Steel 'cause Watchmen showed some maturity, Elysium 'cause, Prototype 'cause of the trailer, and Gravity 'cause of Clooney (wait - it's still got Clooney, right?).

Can wait for: Gangster Squad even though Sean Penn looks like he's left over from Dick Tracy, G.I. Joe: Retaliation really only 'cause it's got Dwayne Johnson and Bruce Willis, World War Z even though it looks like it's fucked the source material, and Kick Ass 2 because let's be honest: I'm a sucker for carnage choreographed to childrens TV show tunes.

Don't care so won't bother considering: Oblivion, Parker, After Earth, The Hobbit, Lone Ranger. Boring boring BORING.  Shitty trailers, too.

And I must say I'm curious about the following: Dead Man Down 'cause the trailer's kinda interesting, Pain and Gain 'cause I'm curious what Michael Bay can do without CGI, The Wolverine even though I'm no fan (but hey, it's directed by James Mangold), Old Boy 'cause it's directed by Spike Lee, and Pacific Rim where hopefully Idris Elba does a whole lot better than he got in Prometheus.

Still can't remember the bloody Bond film but, thanks to Google, it's goddamned Skyfall.  It certainly left an impression on this one, didn't it?

Downton Abbey Christmas Special

Is it possible for a show to parody itself?  I'm sure there's a precedent somewhere (Moonlighting and Star Trek: Next Generation come to mind) but a show as ah, serious as Downton?

Yes, of course I'll be downloading it in the new year.

An awkward ep, to be sure.

Taken 2 - Update

Thank Christ they put some clothes on her.

Pity the rest of the movie didn't get some common sense going - for example, to go to the US embassy does one really need to crash through all the security? having removed the shackles of captivity, does one leave one's ex-wife with the phrase, I'll be right back, or could one perhaps move her to a safer fucking place until further notice?

Meh.

Taken 2 (2012; Oliver Megaton / Luc Besson & Robert Mark Kamen)

The first Taken film was a pleasant surprise:  Mills (Liam Neeson) is a retired spook whose daughter (Maggie Grace) is kidnapped, and he gets her back, no punches pulled.

In this sequel, there's half-an-hour of set-up before the plot kicks in and - spoiler alert if you haven't seen or heard anything about the premise - the tables are turned and its Mills' daughter's turn to rescue her parents.  That's a nice switch, I thought to myself.  It's certainly avoiding the bad luck John McClane has had with his wife in the first few Die Hard films.

I had to stop the film at the 40-minute mark, though:  1). it was past my bedtime, and 2). all the leg, crotch and cleavage shots of Grace were beginning to really grate - and I couldn't get rid of the thought, She's going to spend the rest of the fucking film in those fucking shorty-shorts, isn't she?

An update may follow.

Last Resort S01E09

What an ep.  What stakes.  What complications.

What fuckheads ABC are for not renewing this show.